Hot flashes and Giving

For many years I was on hormone replacement therapy because I had a hysterectomy when I was 45, so I never went through menopause. My very young yet good doctor suggested since it had been 10 years and I should really go through menopause, it was time to stop using the patch. That was OK with me since it tended to stick to my underwear all the time. So, off came the patch and on came the hot flashes. Not major by any means, just warmth and beads of sweat easily handled as they were this morning by using the church bulletin.
Sitting in the pew (chair actually) next to my very, very dear friend, celebrating Christ the King Sunday, which is an hour rundown of the church year in readings and hymns, I experienced several hot flashes which I liken to small tremors of my body. What the hot flashes remind me of is that I'm really not in charge of anything. I cannot stop them, they come and go as they please. The service always reminds me that I'm not in charge of anything, what I have, all that I am is a gift from God. I am to use what I have and who I am in service to Him, not me.
The giving came to me this morning at the breakfast provided between services as part of the Stewardship initiative at church. People spoke of their covenant with our church, with our community both local and beyond. As one speaker pointed out, Lutherans are not comfortable with the word covenant, but in the context of our relationship to each other and to God, it is A OK.
What the Pastor said made us laugh, not only because it was funny, but because it made us nervous. He stated that by giving of our time, talent and treasure, he and our Senior Pastor could not guarantee us winning the lottery, or getting that great job or winning any favor. What giving does is reminds us we are not here for ourselves, by giving we are here for each other. It simply isn't about us. I think sometimes in the way far recesses of our minds we hope it is. That was the nervous laughter I heard, which is fine, for after all we are human. Everyday we hear and see those great advertisements that cleverly entice us to buy or at least dream of buying what we don't need..for after all, isn't it all about us? About me?
This morning, hot flashes and wonderful testimonies of giving soothed my soul...faith is not reaching in, it's reaching out, cosmically we aren't in charge of anything, but we ARE here to do our very best for each other.